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More random than a Rowntrees Random.


MarkW
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Well, when I woke up this morning I never imagined I'd end the day drinking tea with Boycie from Only Fools and Horses and talking about conservation of urban wildlife! :shock:

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Guest Richzx6r

When I was a courier rider I delivered to Russell Howard and thandi newton and saw Phil jupitus on bond street and hes bloody massive

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When I was a courier rider I delivered to Russell Howard and thandi newton and saw Phil jupitus on bond street and hes bloody massive

 

I worked at a Holland and Barrett while at uni, he came in and I sold him protein powder. He was with his partner I believe.


I've got his autograph on the back of a receipt roll.


I asked him if was worth more as he had to write it cack handed (he had his hand in a cast).

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Princess Anne sank my canoe.

 

Please tell me that's true and not a headline from the Sunday Sport. We need to hear more!


:D

 

Absolutely true. She came to open a new marine lake where I used to sail and canoe. On the big day I was late getting to where the ceremony took place and by the time I got there boats had filled the entire wall alongside the podium.


Then I spotted a fence about 50 yards out which no one had latched onto so I paddled out there and had a great view.


As it got nearer to the opening ceremony I noticed lots of people waving at me so being a friendly sort of guy I just waved back. The waving got more active but by then Princess Anne had arrived so I just wanted to watch. She made a speech which I was too far away to hear and then pressed a button to declare the new lake open.


At that moment I suddenly noticed the fence I was holding onto was enclosing a large round pipe, about 2 feet diameter, and the fence was shaking. It turned out that this was a massive water jet to mark the formal opening and I'd parked myself right under it.


On the TV news that night you just saw a huge plume of water shooting into the air, and then descending into my canoe which gracefully sank beneath the waves. I didn't half take some stick over it on school the next day.

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Princess Ann, how low can this thread get :D


She had many honorary military titles, I got to meet her at Otterburn many years ago, I was in charge of the royal loo lol, she was rumored to be pregnant at the time and if said toilet was used the tank had to be taken away and destroyed ( waste tank not an armored one).


Chemicals that were in the tank would have fooked any one trying to get a sample :shock:

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Princess Ann, how low can this thread get :D

 

I see your Princess Anne and raise you an Alan Titchmarsh. I met him once and was properly miffed 'cos I'd been expecting Thora Hird.

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Princess Ann, how low can this thread get :D

 

I see your Princess Anne and raise you an Alan Titchmarsh. I met him once and was properly miffed 'cos I'd been expecting Thora Hird.

 

How about tea in the House of Lords with the Archbishop of Canterbury. (I pinched his after dinner mint.)

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Princess Ann, how low can this thread get :D

 

I see your Princess Anne and raise you an Alan Titchmarsh. I met him once and was properly miffed 'cos I'd been expecting Thora Hird.

 

How about tea in the House of Lords with the Archbishop of Canterbury. (I pinched his after dinner mint.)

 


Is that a secret church term thing for sexuall misconduct :shock:

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I see your Princess Anne and raise you an Alan Titchmarsh. I met him once and was properly miffed 'cos I'd been expecting Thora Hird.

 

How about tea in the House of Lords with the Archbishop of Canterbury. (I pinched his after dinner mint.)

 


Is that a secret church term thing for sexuall misconduct :shock:

 

Nope. It was more a case of there's a job you'd be right for.....End of the story was I pocketed the official House of Lords after dinner mints to give to our kids, but all they did was rip the wrapper off and scoff the chocolate....and I didn't want the job anyway.


Mind you the same trip I got to have dinner with Patrick Head so it wasn't a total loss. (Sadly he didn't offer me a job.)

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One of my clients phoned me up a few weeks ago with the strangest enticement to attend his conference I've ever heard:


Would you like to meet Prince Charles?


- Nope.


Well that's OK, he's not coming.


:scratch:

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When I was about seventeen I had an argument with General Yakubu "Jack" Dan-Yumma Gowon the murderous former Head of State of Nigeria . He wanted to come into Sainsburys at Cannon Park in Coventry but the store was closing and the manager had told me not to let anyone else in . He kept shouting " Do you know who I am !? " to which I replied " No , never heard of you " which only made him more angry . On a brighter note , I had a nice chat with Dave Hill once . Without platform shoes he's tiny but I didn't mention that .

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