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Lost all confidence in riding..... (test now passed)


BigHeavy1095
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Looking for some advice.... :oops:


I did go out for a ride with my instructor in the hopes that he could give me some useful tips and advice but nothing came of it apart from "you definitely have some confidence issues, just ride more, Its all in your head, now payment", he only seemed interested in taking my money. :cry: I know that it is all in my head but I was hoping for more than that. He has also said that until I've sorted these confidence issues out, He isn't willing to take me out on lessons anymore. :cry: The more I ride, the worse it seems to get.


I've been riding on L plates for six years now, Ridden every day in every weather. Always been fine confidence-wise. I've had a few offs but it's only the latest one that has seriously dented my confidence in riding. Im only riding in the dark now due to my working hours (im a door supervisor)


Im having issues with speed, I don't mean Im always speeding. I mean Im finding it hard to get up to and stay at the speed limit. on a 30mph ill generally, sit at 25ish mph and pull to the side to let traffic past if there are more than three cars behind me. Going past junctions, if there is a car my speed drops down another 5mph or so and I completely sh!t myself. (my last accident was when I was doing 40 in a 40, a car pulled out from in front of a parked truck and I hit the car) I also have very little confidence in the bends and I've got a huge fear of going over manhole covers. :oops:


Has anyone got any tips or advice on how to get over these confidence issues? Its really starting to get me down and I almost put my bike up for sale because of it.

Edited by BigHeavy1095
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These are just suggestions so take them as you like. Try and find a good instructor who will help ride with you and give you tips. Consider some NLP as it sounds like you need to reform how you currently view riding, sounds like youre getting stressed thinking about it and missing out on the enjoyment that will help you build confidence. The more you carry on on your own overthinking it the likely worse it will get. Maybe buddy up with someone as well who is willing to help out. things like riding slow and giving people lots of room to overtake is putting you in dangerous situations unnecessarily I think. All just the opinion of a rider who struggles with confidence myself.

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I found that watching hundreds of hours of YouTube training videos, e.g MCRider and RoadCraftNottingham, helped immensely and then putting the stuff into practice really helped me get back in to biking. Learning to read the road ahead comes with practice and experience. I had a car pull out on me many years ago and I am still very cautious when I see vehicles at junctions waiting to pull out. I adopt many of the SMIDSY (Sorry Mate I Didn't See You) tactics like weaving and I have extra lights on the bike to make me more visible. Hope this helps.

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You are a cautious rider, so am I, so are lots of people. That is your style. It has the huge advantage of being the safest way to ride a bike.

 

Im the same

And "OH Shit" moments are VERY Very Rare!


The way I see it is I will get there faster than walking Or the Bus


Believe it or not but I dont often actually Overtake anyone and I NEVER open the engine up unless there are no junctions and definitely no traffic in front.......because when I do open the throttle the Horizon comes up Very fast!

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As mentioned I'm also a cautious rider and basically feel pretty nervous in all conditions except dry, clear roads :lol:. I don't let it ruin my enjoyment though and I just take it slow as I feel comfortable with! One thing I would suggest is though, don't move over to let the cars pass own the lane! You'll get dick heads forcing you further into the gutter if they have the chance.

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I'll probably take a lot of flack for this but here goes.

I think that if after six years of daily riding if you haven't got the hang of it it might be time to hang up your boots.

Surely I can't be the only one that thinks this. Self preservation should be top of your list.


Don't be too hard on me, someone had to say it :cry:

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I'll probably take a lot of flack for this but here goes.

I think that if after six years of daily riding if you haven't got the hang of it it might be time to hang up your boots.

Surely I can't be the only one that thinks this. Self preservation should be top of your list.


Don't be too hard on me, someone had to say it :cry:

 

I assume you missed the part where he had a recent off, which has knocked his confidence. I'm betting an off would knock the confidence of even the most experienced riders.



On a side note, you look a bit too old to be riding maybe you should hang your boots?

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On a slightly more positive note.


My suggestion is in 3 parts


1. start saving

2. suss out a different riding school.

3. grab the bull by the horns and go for the A2 license.



Im not a huge fan of the A2... but in your case i really think you should go for it and move beyond a 125cc bike.

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But I haven't come for advice, so I'll keep riding, by the way I'm 62 and know some very good riders that could put most to shame that are well into their eighties.


I did read the bit about the recent off, I do have sympathy with his position, but sometimes enough is just enough. Not everyone is suited to riding a motorcycle.

After six years..... come on.

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oi keep this to advice rather than taking a pop at people.


First off your instructor sounds a bit of a dick

I know some very good riders who have had an off and it's knocked them right down

Experience should help but you have to be able to push yourself slightly to get over the issues

As mentioned above moving over to let cars pass is dangerous and will encourage you to ride closer to the kerb which is bad road positioning as you won't be as visible. If you feel you are holding people up HOLD your centre of lane position until you find a safe place to fully pull over, stop and let them pass.

Think about your accident. Were you aware there was a junction? Had you slowed? Had you moved slightly to the centre of the road to improve your visibility to other users?

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After six years you should know if you want to continue or not, maybe you need to make sure it's something you want to continue with cause if your head and your heart are not in it your going to be creating situations and excuses to put yourself off.


If you do want to continue then you need to have yourself a goal.


Find.a good instructor take some lessons and go for your license.


As you have the control side pretty much done or you should have after six years, concentrate on position and safety, you need to learn to ride defensive and not feel your causing a problem for every other road user.


Explain the off to a decent instructor and they will walk through where and what you should have been doing.


Good luck with whatever course of action you take.

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But I haven't come for advice, so I'll keep riding, by the way I'm 62 and know some very good riders that could put most to shame that are well into their eighties.


I did read the bit about the recent off, I do have sympathy with his position, but sometimes enough is just enough. Not everyone is suited to riding a motorcycle.

After six years..... come on.

 

You missed the point of my comments, I don’t think anyone is too old to ride. You’re assuming he’s terrible at riding and it’s not for him because his confidence is low. You’re just going to make it worse with crap like that.

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Going over manhole covers - yep, you're right to be wary. They provide no grip and are often badly maintained. That one comment alone suggests part of the problem is that you aren't using positioning right, which gets you into all sort of issues and then riding becomes unpleasant and sometimes downright scary. You really shouldn't need to be riding over manhole covers at all.


Then you get those nasty lines of smooth tarmac they use on the edge of repairs, those are worth avoiding as well.


Of course, if you're riding only in the dark you stand less chance of seeing all these things, so less opportunity to develop an awareness of how road position either helps or hinders your confidence.


Pulling in to allow cars to pass is linked to this - you're putting yourself in more danger by being dominated by other traffic rather than you asserting your presence on the road. It is a state of mind and it's important when you are the most vulnerable part of the equation. Pulling in also means you are being reactive rather than proactive, you'll end up riding on bits of the road in a poor position where you really don't want to be.


I think part of that may be down to riding habits you've got into over the years which are increasingly defensive. Having an off doesn't help so it's a vicious circle. Being aware of a junction, slowing down, adopting a different position to make yourself more visible and give you more options is all part of riding. Risk is there, it's how you handle it that makes the difference.


I think you need a mentor / tutor who takes you seriously and addresses the issues you've developed. I also think you'd benefit from riding something a bit bigger - they handle better, they've got better brakes, are more visible, tend not to get pushed about by motorists as much. Plus it will make you think from scratch and address some the habits you may have gotten into which are making riding scary.


I'd start by contacting a few riding schools and talking to them, you'll soon know if they're listening and taking you seriously. Not everyone who can pass the qualifications to be an instructor is actually able to teach people so look around. You're paying for it so get someone who listens to you.

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Given the mental issues are basically trauma based (having an off will cause mental trauma as it's a shock), the only way to beat them is to take them on and get through them. If you don't, you will never beat them.


Best of luck.


Edit: in fact if you are really struggling to get your head round it even with a decent instructor, I'd really advise looking at seeing someone to talk to about it as you might need either the ability to talk it out or maybe some behaviour retraining. Your local GP surgery is a good place to start for that kind of thing :)

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Your local GP surgery is a good place to start for that kind of thing :)

What, tory NHS? Don't think so, somehow. There's people starving and dying in the gutters because of those twats, so good luck with getting mental health treatment with your motorbikin' issues. :evil:

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To be honest, riding in this cold, wet, windy weather at night is not the best conditions for regaining confidence, the most confident riders can be unnerved by it so it must be a nightmare after an off.

Maybe park the bike up until spring (if possible) and then get out in better conditions to regain your confidence in dry bright conditions.

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I won't make it any worse from here on. But he did ask and that was my opinion, I'll keep my opinions to myself from now, wasn't trying to be negative just giving a different point of view.

 

It's a valid consideration IMO. Knowing when to push on and when to cut your losses is a valuable life skill.


But i reckon circumstances are the main problem. Riding at night with a crappy 125 headlight after a long night at work dealing with drunken idiots isn't the most conducive environment in which to gain confidence.

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Thanks for the replies and the advice guys. I've not been able to reply sooner because I've been taking on as much work as possible.


I managed to record a ride home, for those that would like to see what I mean about my riding. The camera makes it look like I'm going slower than I actually am but you'll see on the speedo I stick between 20-30mph. https://youtu.be/q-IsnJ5HhO4


I'm not giving it up.


I've been around and spoke to a few instructors now and been for a "assessment" ride with one of them, I'm booked in for a lesson with him next Wednesday. Need to get theory done before I can do much more than just confidence building though. Did the assessment ride on a 500 which was a eye opener to how the 125 is holding me back :shock:

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I managed to record a ride home, for those that would like to see what I mean about my riding.

 

DISCLAIMER I'm not trained in any way these are just my thoughts and observations :cheers:


1. Does your headlight work?? wow in some of those darker areas it didn't look like it illuminated the road at all! Maybe adjustment needed? Or maybe my phone just making it look worse than it it

2. right hand turns, you tend to cut over the centre line of the road you're turning into - try going a bit further forward before turning to ensure you turn into the centre of the lane.

3. left bends, you seem to drift a bit to the kerb, especially on country roads you want to get over to the centre of the road to increase your visibility of what's coming.

4. General road position seems ok.

5. Pulling over... I think you did so 4 times? The last one was a bit sketchy as there was a car coming the other way which meant you were more of a hindrance stopping where you did. Make sure you don't get lost looking behind so much you don't assess what's ahead

6. A car was pulling out of a side road at one point, as it was safe to do so don't be afraid to cross the central line to make yourself more visible and give yourself as much escape room as possible.

7. I think it was around 3 minutes in there were some lights that had been green for ages and it felt like you sped up approaching them then had to brake a bit harder than needed when they changed (again I'm watching on my phone so open to corrections)

8. Whilst we all do it, make sure you don't stop in the cycle boxes on your test :wink:

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I managed to record a ride home, for those that would like to see what I mean about my riding.

 

DISCLAIMER I'm not trained in any way these are just my thoughts and observations :cheers:


1. Does your headlight work?? wow in some of those darker areas it didn't look like it illuminated the road at all! Maybe adjustment needed? Or maybe my phone just making it look worse than it it

 

I've been having issues with the headlight on and off since I've had the bike. High beam is actually low Beam and low beam is high beam. Bulbs blow every other week without fail and the headlight wasn't adjusted properly in that video (taken the day after the first post in the thread) but was done the very next day for the bikes MOT. One of the bolts that was securing the headlight had gone missing after my colleague tried to change the bulb even though I told him not to bother, I'd just do it in daylight and ride home on high beam/spot lamps.

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