FLHTCU

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I wandered into the dealership with my little girl and was just looking, I'd been without my Guzzi for four weeks and was facing another fortnight without it. The salesman asked if he could help, "no thanks mate, I couldn't afford one if I wanted it anyway."

By 4pm I'd signed the paperwork and the following day I was on a train to Wolverhampton to collect it.

First impressions were that it was the size of a 55ft narrowboat, much beloved on the West Mids canals. The sales rep handed over a free load of key rings, free GAP insurance, a free rucksack, free HOG membership and free advice. His advice was limited to the gears and how to open the boxes - demonstrating the full range of switches, buttons and stuff was right out.

It was cheap, a year old with around 12K on the clock as it was an ex-HD Fly-Ride bike. Saving over eight grand on the price of a new'un meant that it came with a KPH clock; "no problem Sir, we'll replace that within a month".

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Wobbling out into the Wolverhampton rush-hour crawl I was struck that it handled like a 55ft narrowboat. With the radio stuck on TalkLikeABrummie FM I suddenly realised I'd forgotten how to mentally convert speeds to MPH as I flew past a speed camera...the first of several thousand speed cameras on my way back to Aston.

Two hours later and I'm stuck on the side of the road with a misfire. Two hours five minutes later and I'm demonstrating my outstanding command of the ruder bits of the English language on a mobile phone. Very loudly.

Four hours after collecting the bike it is being loaded into the back of a van and being driven back to the dealers.

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Shortly I was flying around, filtering and lobbing it into bends like it was a little racer - but one that, when the sun came out, you could pop on the open face, turn up the volume on the 80W quad stereo and cruise through your own personal film set. Gloriously comfortable, a pounding engine reeking soul and a wealth a gadgets. My smile grew with each mile.

Unfairly knocked for the agricultural nature of everything, the Brembo triple disks hauled up the unladen 851lbs promptly enough for me.

6 gallons would see me refuel after 200 miles clocked up, but always had an indicated 260-70 miles to empty on the countdown and my trip down to Clermond Ferrand demonstrated that the bike was well up for the long haul.

I commuted throughout winter on it and the finish didn't get effected one bit after a liberal coating of ACF50. The boxes remained dry throughout the worst of downpours and the set-up at the front ensured that I remained cocooned from the weather. I rode back from Coventry one night in a downpour in just a hoody and a cut - my kneecaps were the only part of me that was damp when I arrived back in North Brum.

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Downsides

1. The price of a new set of tyres required me to remortgage the house

2. HOG members are, well - watch Wild Hogs

3. The cost of servicing and parts is obscene

4. Stratstone Wolverhampton are a bunch of lying, two-faced, lying shits who live to lie.

Would I have another 2008 FLHTCU Electra Glide Ultra Classic? In a shot, but only as a second bike. When I bought my XJ900S I hardly took the Harley out of the garage which is what convinced me to get shot and try something different.

is that a freshly ploughed field in the background of the last photo?

nice review. a guy in my club has had one (looks the sameanyway) from new and loves it. after 25 years or so of putting up with it he has too. i suppose it is a bit like being married.

and dont upset the HOG.. they'll hold a meeting in the village hall and start a petition or somehting.

Hehe, muchly enjoyed your review, does sound like you had a saucy fling with her - a good ride but too expensive in the long run . Looks the bollocks, not my style but I can v much appreciate the epic-ness!