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Your worst joke!!!


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It's my wife's 40 birthday coming up and I want to do something special, so I asked her what she wanted to do.


She said "I want to go somewhere I've never been before".


I said "Try the kitchen".

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A friend of mine burned to death when his barber shop was set on fire. He could have escaped, but he was always told not to run with scissors

 



You been opening the Christmas crackers early :D

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A load of pikeys came into my local last night, mouthing off and threatening to batter everyone. The locals said nothing and let them carry on, but not me, I decided to show them exactly what I’m made of.


Turns out it’s fragile bones and lots of blood :oops:

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7yr old: Mum, what happens if you eat lots of tinsel?


Mum: probably emergency surgery to prevent obstruction somewhere in your digestive system.


7yr old: *blank face* *small voice* you get tinselitis.

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