Mississippi Bullfrog Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 I am always on the lookout for words that convey wisdom.I'll start the ball rolling with the latest from our church magazine....Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joeman Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 I was told this a while ago and it seems pretty accurate, but looks so much cooler with Ali-G I had to upload the meme Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goat Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 simpsons is a gold mine for wise sayings."What’s the point of going out? We’re just gonna wind up back here anyway"“You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: Never try.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geofferz Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 "Why go hard when you can go home?" (because staying in is for winners) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonraker Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 Don't forget to drink water and get some sunlight because you're basically a house plant with more complicated emotions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkW Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 "Never w*nk on the carpet when you should be balls deep in your brothers wife" (slight paraphrasing of Genesis 38:9). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slowlycatchymonkey Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 "Never w*nk on the carpet when you should be balls deep in your brothers wife" (slight paraphrasing of Genesis 38:9). A tad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slowlycatchymonkey Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 One of my quiet friends said under his breath once whilst some guide was trying to fleece us tip wise-“Tip? Don’t eat yellow snow” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
megawatt Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 You're better looking at it than for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SometimesSansEngine Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 "> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joeman Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 Celery is 90% water, so if I walk on celery that makes me 90% Jesus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 One I tend to keep using at work recently! Snitches get stitches Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Six30 Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 If women ruled the world there would be no wars.Just a bunch of countries not talking to eachother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bender Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 Never take an idiot with youYou can always pick one up when you get there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mickly Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 Never trust a hippie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muttly Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 If at first you don’t succeed you are obviously not a parrot. (My dad)It’ll be alright in the end, if it’s not alright, it’s not the end.Whether you think you can or you think you cannot, you are right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 "Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so." "It's unpleasantly like being drunk." "What's unpleasant about being drunk?" "Just you ask a glass of water!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muttly Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 It must be a Thursday, I never could get the hang of Thursdays. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phooey Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 From my RAF days ... 'Rules are for the obedience of fools and the guidance of wise men'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 Don't put pinkies where you wouldn't put your Dinky .. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tankbag Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muttly Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 To have found this has alwaya helped with perspective:Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonraker Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 Never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down the their level and then beat you with experience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MR_W Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 If at first you don't succeed skydiving is not your sport. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Fro Posted October 16, 2018 Share Posted October 16, 2018 I was given two outstanding pieces of advice by my grandfather:1 - Always look at the mother.2 - Big tits at twenty, fat wife at forty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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