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Nob of the Day.......


Tango
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So I was filtering, right.


And the road was a touch narrow, and a lorry was oncoming. So I pulled in. And the only place I could land the bike was in this big divot.


Front wheel went in, and it felt like I was descending a hill. Came up out the other side.


Came to a stop making sure that my foot didn't disappear into the mouth of hell. No bother.


Lorry went past. Then a stream of cars. Sat waiting for a bit. Fortune favours the conservative when filtering I find.


I can spot a nice gap after the last car, so here we go, a small angled start to get back out around the traffic.....


Only by now I've somehow already forgotten about the moon crater that I'm straddling, and just as I dink the bike to the right the back wheel goes in, like Neil Armstrong bringing down the moon lander with only a few moments of fuel left I descend. My brain thinks the bike is falling so I let out the clutch a bit and both my legs flail out, waving away like an octopus has suddenly found itself on a motorcycle and trying to make sense of it all.


And of course, in but a moment the bike has happily exited said abyss and wondering why on earth the stupid rider is doing so much to unsettle it, it's of course more than capable of handling such a minor cavity on the road surface, but the pilot of said machine takes a few more seconds to twig what is going on and that now everything is all OK as he wobbles and weaves down the road like St Nick's belly wobbling like a bowlful of jelly.


I'm sure none of the drivers queuing witnessed the smoothness :oops:

Edited by SometimesSansEngine
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Only by now I've somehow already forgotten about the moon crater that I'm straddling, and just as I dink the bike to the right the back wheel goes in, like Neil Armstrong bringing down the moon lander with only a few moments of fuel I descend. My brain thinks the bike is falling so I let out the clutch a bit and both my legs flail out, waving away like an octopus has suddenly found itself on a motorcycle and trying to make sense of it all.

It is very difficult for me to explain why I'm sniggering like a school girl at my desk!


Love this description and as a rider who's bike is potentially a little tall for me, I know that feeling All too well :lol:

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Ok, first post on my new phone and I'd like to nominate myself . So I bought a Moto G6 and so far I'm delighted with it.When I got it home I went to install the SIM card only to discover that I need a nano SIM. Shit , the Tesco mobile shop will be shut in an hour ! So off I went peddling my push-bike into the teeth of a hurricane to get there before it closes. Imagine what a nob I felt when the girl in the shop took my Micro SIM and pushed the Nano SIM out of the center ! Oh well , I came away with a better data deal .

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yep and that's exactly what happened to me last week in a phone shop :oops: a few years ago all sim cards were the same size and then they have to go and complicate things :x

 

I just don't see any point in miniturisation unless space is in short supply. Phones are getting bigger and my eyesight is not improving . They're probably gearing up to the day when you have all your tec installed in your head and you just shove a SIM card into your ear .

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I had the same issue with my new honor 10 only my sim didn't have the option to make it smaller so I had to wait an extra week to play with my new phone :x

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The young lad who I saw riding with a red bike light hanging off the back of his scooter because his rear light wasn't working. Not only that but he'd duct taped his visor on and was clearly doing take away deliveries as he had one of those enormous insulated bags on his back. I only hope he's made it home safely. He's been reported to the police more for his safely than anything else.

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The driver reading his Amazon Kindle on his knee in traffic today

 

In the summer when they do that - or use their phone - with the window open....am I the only one who feels the urge to lean in, grab the device, and lob it across the road?

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The driver reading his Amazon Kindle on his knee in traffic today

 

Was filtering the other day going into work and the chelsea tractor in front of me kept veering to the middle and back again, couldn't get through. Finally got a gap and as I passed I saw the guy was engrossed in his phone, with the window open an inch so I just stopped the bike, leaned over and shouted "GET OFF THE f**king PHONE!!!" He jumped out his seat and the phone flew onto the dash :up: Think the high vis jacket, white helmet and white bike made him think I was a copper for a second, rode on laughing myself stupid after that :D

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The driver reading his Amazon Kindle on his knee in traffic today

 

In the summer when they do that - or use their phone - with the window open....am I the only one who feels the urge to lean in, grab the device, and lob it across the road?

 


 

The driver reading his Amazon Kindle on his knee in traffic today

 

Was filtering the other day going into work and the chelsea tractor in front of me kept veering to the middle and back again, couldn't get through. Finally got a gap and as I passed I saw the guy was engrossed in his phone, with the window open an inch so I just stopped the bike, leaned over and shouted "GET OFF THE f**king PHONE!!!" He jumped out his seat and the phone flew onto the dash :up: Think the high vis jacket, white helmet and white bike made him think I was a copper for a second, rode on laughing myself stupid after that :D

 

I've done this. And had similar where the phone went flying. Also done the knowing stare where the person puts it down like a naughty child.


People think they're being subtle but no-one drives along staring at their crotch.

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Can I nominate a "nob of most days"? If so, it would have to be my neighbour, who always parks her car on the street directly in front of her house, even if it means parking in the middle of a space big enough for two cars.


:-x

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Me. For the fuel tank issue. That nearly caused me to stack it a few hundred metres from home. Feeling quite the idiot right now.


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I dunno, I think you saved that really well!


How many people would have stuffed it there?


Not me obviously - I would have pinned the throttle, pulled a massive powerslide through that first bend and drifted seamlessly through the second one. 8-)

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Me. For the fuel tank issue. That nearly caused me to stack it a few hundred metres from home. Feeling quite the idiot right now.


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Well held sir. :thumb:

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Me. For the fuel tank issue. That nearly caused me to stack it a few hundred metres from home. Feeling quite the idiot right now.


">

 

New underwear?

 

I need new under wear. That video makes my stomach do flips 😱

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Me. For the fuel tank issue. That nearly caused me to stack it a few hundred metres from home. Feeling quite the idiot right now.


">

 

New underwear?

 

I think the bike nearly disappeared up my backside I clenched so hard.... so probably need the underwear too :lol:

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Multiple nobs are guilty on this but one special one yesterday- on the motorway when drivers overtake and pull back in front of you leaving a tiny whisker of space between you and them causing you to brake or slow to provide some sort of safe braking distance between you. Yesterday’s nob was particularly entertaining as after performing this annoying manoeuvre I read the sticker on the back of his van that said


IF I STOP

CAN YOU?


I could only read this irritating message because he’d pulled back in so tightly, when the 2 second gap was reinstated you couldnt see it! Nob.

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